Criticism is the expression of disapproval of someone or something based on perceived faults or mistakes. Criticism creates a very negative environment. Even if your criticism is hidden in jokes or off handed comments, it is still criticism. It can create defeat and resentment. So why do we criticize others? The purpose is to shift the spotlight off of oneself and onto someone or something else in an effort to feel safe or better about yourself. There are three types of criticism: destructive—tears down, constructive—builds together and identifies a problem and offers a solution, and instructive—adds on what someone knows. The key is learning to use constructive or instructive criticism, not destructive criticism. I am sure we all have experienced destructive criticism. My first marriage was a very destructive and abusive relationship. He would use destructive criticism on me all the time. He would say things such as: “You are fat.” “You are stupid.” “You are an idiot.” “You are ugly.” “Can’t you do anything right.” “What is wrong with you.” to name a few. I felt so worthless from the words and abuse. When I got out of the marriage, I was a shell of a person, I had been so beaten down. But from that relationship, my relationship with God became stronger and stronger. God was my rock, my hope, my salvation. God built me up and held me close. He was and is my all in all. Even though going through that relationship was hard. I became stronger, rooted in God and was able to help other people who were abused. James 4:6 reads, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” If you are being criticized, remember you do not need to take it personally. Regardless, of whether the criticism feels justified or not, it is probably not about you. Maybe that person is having a bad day or maybe their delivery wasn’t as kind as it could have been or maybe they are right or maybe they are wrong. Sometimes we need to give people the benefit of the doubt, process their words, if the words apply maybe you need to adjust, if not let the words go and move on. You can tell if they are abusive or not. Then pray for them. It is something to think about. God Bless. Amen.